I'll be honest, I spent any free time this week preparing a talk, and a Sunday School lesson, a primary lesson and a VT message. It was like finals week. My talk, a couple quotes from the kids and photos...
Maeser: After his coach handed him his first team jersey, "Mom, we're champions!"
Scout: "No potty jokes!"
“Then Jesus Beholding Him Loved Him”- Elder S. Mark Palmer
Several years ago, I began training for a race on The Great Wall in Beijing. It was something that sounded exciting, exotic, and difficult. I trained hard in preparation. Knowing that the entire race would be on the wall, I began running stairs. I ran stairs for months, and if Dan was traveling I ran the 2 flights of stairs in our home after the children went to bed.
On race day, I was so nervous I didn’t speak to anyone on the bus ride out. I was thrilled with the race, the hype, the pre-race jitters. The wall was huge, crumbling, steep, sometimes steps away from cliffs… and it was really hard. After 4 hours I was in good shape to win the shorter course, so I did. I finished.
I actually ran the race with friends. But you wouldn’t know it, I didn’t share any of my experience with them. I began waiting for my friends. The race officials wouldn’t let me back up on the wall after finishing. It was a long wait.
After the race, my friends talked about how beautiful the ancient wall had been. How they had talked to other runners from all over the world. They had stopped to take pictures with them and run sections of the race with them.
I had worked very hard in preparation and on the day of the event, but wasn’t happy with the result. In those few moments after the race ended my perspective on what was important about it had totally changed. Sure, I had beat everyone in getting to the finish line only to discover that no one, including myself, actually cared about that. I had missed out on much of the natural and historic splendor and missed sharing this great experience with my close friends. It was a lesson to me that I need to first have a clear and correct understanding, with proper perspective, before taking action.
Elder Palmer summarizes the story of a rich young man who was also doing all he thinks he can, and still has a desire to draw closer to the Savior.
“There came one running … and asked him, Good Master, what shall I do that I may inherit eternal life?
“And Jesus said unto him, …
“Thou knowest the commandments, Do not commit adultery, Do not kill, Do not steal, Do not bear false witness, Defraud not, Honour thy father and mother.
“And he answered … , Master, all these have I observed from my youth.
“Then Jesus beholding him loved him, and said unto him, One thing thou lackest: go thy way, sell whatsoever thou hast, and give to the poor, and thou shalt have treasure in heaven: and come, take up the cross, and follow me.”2
“As [Elder Palmer] heard these words, a vivid image filled [his] mind of our Lord pausing and beholding this young man. Seeing his soul, recognizing his goodness and potential, and discerning his greatest need.”
Christ sees each of us. We are not invisible to him, as we may be to others hurrying about us. “He sees us as we really are and who we may become, not for what we are doing or not doing?”
For those of us who find that we pass through some of life’s experiences on our own, we might ask 2 questions:
· “How can I “behold” others like the Savior?”
· “How can I be filled with Christ like love so I (or others) can feel the love of God through me and desire to change?”
From that passage, Elder Palmer said the Spirit taught him these truths:
1. As we learn to see others as the Lord sees them, rather than with our own eyes, our love for them will grow and so will our desire to help them.
“Then Jesus beholding him loved him”. Those words were given before any correction or invitation.
If we have a desire to draw closer to the Lord we must learn to see His Children as He does.
· A missionary may see an investigator as they may become. They see investigators being baptized, sealed with their families. They see them breaking bad habits, becoming better fathers, and eventually ready to teach and lift others.
· A friend can see past a day when you are struggling and lift you until you can stand independently again.
· A mother may see a small discouraged child and recognize that the misunderstandings of today will bring knowledge and empathy tomorrow.
This ability is a gift.
Elder Eyring shared a story two weeks ago:
I remember once a seven- or eight-year-old son of ours jumping on his bed hard enough that I thought it might break. I felt a flash of frustration, and I moved quickly to set my house in order. I grabbed my son by his little shoulders and lifted him up to where our eyes met. The Spirit put words into my mind. It seemed a quiet voice, but it pierced to my heart: “You are holding a great person.” I gently set him back on the bed and apologized.
Now he has become the great man the Holy Ghost let me see 40 years ago.
Someone once saw that potential in me. My Sunday School teacher in High School was a convert, an immigrant from Ghana, and former Olympic athlete. I am certain the day his family moved into our neighborhood he was called to be our Sunday School teacher. He was huge and intimidating- I’m sure the bishop was hoping to instill some discipline.
Within weeks he was attending different school events for each of us. HS band concerts, tennis matches and track meets. The first comment he made to me was, “You could run faster.” I graduated and for the next three months he met me at the track at 6am each morning until he walked me into the BYU track office and told the Coach I should be on the team.
This was the first of many more opportunities to experience new things and grow. It taught me that our influence on others, even strangers, can extend for decades.
If we desire, We WILL see potential in others they likely do not see in themselves.
2. No teaching or learning will ever occur when done in frustration or anger, and hearts will not change where love is not present.
Before correcting the young man, we read the simple words—Jesus loved him. He felt love and compassion for this young man. “Whether we act in our roles as parents, teachers, or leaders- true teaching will only happen in an atmosphere of trust rather than condemnation.”
In D&C 121 we are taught that the powers of heaven are inseparably connected with the priesthood. And that the heavens withdraw themselves when the Spirit is not present. We have all experienced that the natural disposition of man will not be the Lord’s way. But we should learn to teach with “… persuasion, by long-suffering, by gentleness and meekness, and by love unfeigned; by kindness, and pure knowledge… reproving betimes with sharpness, when moved upon by the Holy Ghost; and then showing forth afterwards an increase of love toward him whom thou hast reproved…”
The Lord will treat us the same. Elder J. Devn Cornish said, “He will love and correct but never discourage us…”
3. Love should never be withdrawn when a child, friend, or family member fails to live up to our expectations.
I agree with Elder Palmer when he said, “We don’t know what happened to the rich young man after he went away sorrowful, but I am confident Jesus still loved him perfectly even if he chose the easier path.”
That one word sorrowful really draws me in. As Elder Holland so eloquently taught: “Among the realities we face as children of God living in a fallen world is that some days are difficult, days when our faith and our fortitude are tested. These challenges may come from a lack in us, a lack in others, or just a lack in life, but whatever the reasons, we find they can rob us of songs we so much want to sing…”
This is sorrow. A desire and yet insufficient strength.
Elder Holland then asked “…What do we do in such times?” Among many suggestions he says, to “draw strength from the splendor of the music around us.”
Last November, I received a heartbreaking phone call from a family member to let me know about a decision he’d made that he assumed would cut himself off from the family. As we spoke, God gave me a glimpse of the love he had for this man. And my heart swelled. I cried because he incorrectly thought his decision would isolate him from everyone he loved. When you know someone is struggling it is a time for us to offer more comfort, more love and encouragement.
Loved ones will do things that will disappoint us but that’s not a reason to love them less, and is usually a terrible time to do so. We won’t be judged for their decisions but for how we react to them, and seeing them as Jesus does will help us treat them with love and not self-righteousness.
Elder Renlund said, “Let us fully mirror His love and love one another so openly and completely that no one feels abandoned, alone, or hopeless.” (Insert Elder Renlund’s talk from General Conference in its entirety HERE.)
4. Because He loves us, the Lord expects much of us. “Because of this love, Jesus asked even more of the young man, knowing what he really needed.” It is sad that the man left in sorrow. This need not be our story. “He entreated all to follow him… His way is the path that leads to happiness in this life and eternal life in the world to come.” (The Living Christ)
If we are humble, we will welcome the Lord’s invitation to repent, to sacrifice, or to serve. “After all, an invitation to repent is also an invitation to receive the wonderful gift of forgiveness and peace. Therefore, “despise not … the chastening of the Lord, …for whom the Lord loveth he chasteneth.” (Elder Palmer)
The gift to see others as the Lord does, is just that, a gift of the Spirit. And those gifts are given to those who desire to do His work. This desire will foster love and understanding. Giving a bit more of ourselves, offering to be molded by the Lord and willing to change may be the hardest task of all, for our natural self will resist.
I know our Savior lives and like the young man, I also have a desire to inherit eternal life. I know He loves me enough to ask me to give more. When you are asked to do something hard, think of the Lord beholding you, loving you, and inviting you to step up.
In the name of Jesus Christ, amen.
